Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
