apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize