I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
he fucked my hip out of place.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
