Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
