ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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