I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
