It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
