I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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