I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Randomize
