I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize