I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
