I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Randomize
