The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NoShamevember. You game?
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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