Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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