Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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