the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
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He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
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My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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