And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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