Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize
