I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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