i jhust puked up my retainher.
What a fucking waste of an outfit
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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