just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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