Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Randomize
