Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
