i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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