Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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