I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
