No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
try to milk me bitch
Randomize