Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I made him laugh his dick is mine
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I had to cum in my sink.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
