So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
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Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
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There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Randomize