No stitches, just platelets and will power
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
This toilet bowl is my home.
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