is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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