Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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