How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize