you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Randomize
