After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
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He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
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We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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