So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Randomize
