They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize