Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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