She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
