you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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