don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
Randomize
