so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
