the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
