omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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