You work out of a Hotel?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
