i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
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