Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Randomize
