New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Watching her eat just hurts me
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
