A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
