I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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