He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Randomize
