If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
